void

My heart feels alittle more painful than usual. The motion of waiting on shore, looking out for my team is really horrible. I feel terrible. The pinch is painful. Its like so fucking void inside. As usual, an occasional thought will slip into this void heart or mind unknowingly. Come on, people's minds can't be complete empty i guess? The waiting is horrible, so i thought by looking at the sky will make me feel a wee bit better. i wait. and wait. and keep waitinggggg. and they are finally here. My heart feels even more painful than it was. Their shaggy espressions really make me feel like an asshole. why am i not there training hard with them? fuck this. i hate this. why didn't i clarify the training time with them? why? painnnn =(

Throughout the 4 years of rowing, Dragonboat taught me many simple theories. One of them is something to do with mistakes. Never ever rush your pace. Take one step at a time. Remember, make sure you make the least mistake along the way. We can't undo our mistakes. Mistakes might just end our efforts and everything that we nurtured during the fucking process.

To add on, she don't worth your time. Sometimes i feel.. instead of bitching about her, why not you guys make use of the time to bond or fine tune the current assets (loyal rowers) you have right now. They need your attention more.. She don't worth your time to even bitch about seriously. No matter how much i dislike her, how much she's getting on my nerves. (she's scared of me anyway). i choose to eject her from my brain. She don't worth my time to be even pissed about. They sayyy... "Ignorance is bliss" she's just like a big fat poo poo on the floor. Just ignore.

Fine, with that aside.I'm often asked what i think about as i run alone. Why do i prefer running alone? Seriously, i dont have any clue. Ehhh maybe i just want to maintain my own slient, private time, stay focus and work on my mental. When i'm running alone, i don't have to talk to anybody and don't have to listen to anybody. All i did is gaze the beautiful yet boring scenery passing by. You get the idea? Usually i will think about stuff that are not worth mention. Its pretty stupid and senseless stuff. You wouldn't want to know i guess? Shld i run fast or slow? You see.. The faster i run, the shorter distance i cover. The slower i run, the longer distance i can cover. Oh well, most of the time i like to take slow. you know... slow and steady... breath in and outttt. Nice. I like.

The Prawn never fail to make me smile. Oh you stupid prawn! I am going to feed you like a pig over at aussieeee.